Four score and seven weeks ago our founding father set out to overcome the oppressive tyranny of the plastic gift card empire — promulgators of propaganda, deacons of deceit, big budget, big business boors bent on brainwashing us into believing that plastic is really better than paper. O.K., maybe that overstating things a bit but he knew enough to realize that he was suffering from acute gift card oversaturification.

It all began that fateful day when he looked in a kitchen drawer and saw 2 plastic bags.  One was labeled “retail” and the other labeled “food”. Each contained several of the little false idols of gifting good intentions gone wrong — traditional plastic gift cards.

Who were they from? Who do they belong to? How much are they worth? Have they expired? What is a dormancy fee? Where is Cousin Jimmy’s Burger Barn anyway? What is this 1-800 number and why do I need a 16 digit code? Can someone get a magnifying glass and read the fine print for me?

And then his dim bulb grew a bit brighter (the microwave may have been on) and it hit him - “There is a better way! It’s cash! Cash is king, not the little plastic imitator. Cash will be the cure for chronic giftcarditis!”

And so began the journey to return cash to its rightful place, to extol its many virtues and to spread the word of the joy it brings to those who give and those who receive it. It is, after all, the always-in-style, freedom-to-choose, never-expiring, always-know-the-balance, perfect-fit better alternative to the gift card. On that we all agree!